this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
