I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drake has all the answers
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
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