That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
