that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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