her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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