Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize