she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
well, you know. whores of a feather.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
