I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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