He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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