There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
