I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
My breasts were aching with rage.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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