I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize