the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
