Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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