they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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