I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
