is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Randomize
