i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
