She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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