so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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