The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room