I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
