I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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