as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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