your parents love me but you hate me
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
