A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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