Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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