careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Randomize
