I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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