Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson http://tfl.nu/hv6u
  Replies (27) Good night (814) Bad night (2652)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  you're out of your mind

  (518): View more from New York

  you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear

  (518): View more from New York

  it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): you're out of your mind (518): you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear (518): it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence http://tfl.nu/wmaw
  Replies (11) Good night (842) Bad night (2247)
• Favorite

  (956): View more from Texas

  She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (956): She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy. http://tfl.nu/bi3k
  Replies (11) Good night (1532) Bad night (4155)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for? http://tfl.nu/nqhg
  Replies (9) Good night (2842) Bad night (1244)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer. http://tfl.nu/4dxu
  Replies (6) Good night (2230) Bad night (828)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused. http://tfl.nu/3089
  Replies (14) Good night (2654) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix. http://tfl.nu/eau6
  Replies (3) Good night (650) Bad night (1138)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass

  (240): View more from Maryland

  He should have died. Natural selection.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass (240): He should have died. Natural selection. http://tfl.nu/8itz
  Replies (13) Good night (2730) Bad night (853)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor. http://tfl.nu/e8dt
  Replies (8) Good night (1087) Bad night (562)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state. http://tfl.nu/7xin
  Replies (24) Good night (457) Bad night (1245)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering http://tfl.nu/ujc0
  Replies (6) Good night (635) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny. http://tfl.nu/fa67
  Replies (5) Good night (614) Bad night (400)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (207): Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note? http://tfl.nu/0uql
  Replies (3) Good night (610) Bad night (222)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help http://tfl.nu/aa2d
  Replies (4) Good night (442) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later http://tfl.nu/zhqr
  Replies (3) Good night (664) Bad night (329)

Randomize