put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
