We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
this boner is exhausting
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
