She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize