Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself

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(902): she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself http://tfl.nu/wlq8

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(740): View more from Ohio

Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?

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(740): Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong? http://tfl.nu/7sw3

Replies (13) Good night (3994) Bad night (893)
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(949): View more from California

i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.

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(949): i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole. http://tfl.nu/wmi4

Replies (37) Good night (692) Bad night (3185)
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(310): View more from California

i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."

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(310): i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week." http://tfl.nu/whj8

Replies (86) Good night (20745) Bad night (1779)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life

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(617): Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life http://tfl.nu/020c

Replies (11) Good night (1209) Bad night (4403)
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(302): View more from Delaware

i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

story of my life.

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(302): i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch. (484): story of my life. http://tfl.nu/5i11

Replies (29) Good night (1475) Bad night (4204)
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(616): View more from Michigan

you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed

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(616): you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed http://tfl.nu/lgzp

Replies (15) Good night (4997) Bad night (1671)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time

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(617): he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time http://tfl.nu/x6gg

Replies (21) Good night (1221) Bad night (5625)
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(802): View more from Vermont

Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.

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(802): Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good. http://tfl.nu/wigs

Replies (9) Good night (2204) Bad night (4077)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.

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(203): Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good. http://tfl.nu/s47l

Replies (3) Good night (999) Bad night (2598)
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(914): View more from New York

He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List

(914): View more from New York

Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)

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(914): He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List (914): Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired) http://tfl.nu/bfp9

Replies (28) Good night (1915) Bad night (1019)
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(816): View more from Missouri

im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death

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(816): im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death http://tfl.nu/dz9y

Replies (3) Good night (1628) Bad night (624)
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(520): View more from Arizona

This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.

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(520): This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina. http://tfl.nu/8kic

Replies (9) Good night (972) Bad night (425)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship

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(508): I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship http://tfl.nu/b7qc

Replies (4) Good night (894) Bad night (456)
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(302): View more from Delaware

I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.

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(302): I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats. http://tfl.nu/iukq

Replies (1) Good night (654) Bad night (305)

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