I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
