i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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