Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize
