Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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