isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
How external is "for external use only"?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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