Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
