Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize