Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize