Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
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