yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize