Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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