return my video game
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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