Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
