apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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