do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Randomize
