You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
